" Miserable creature ! You really don't know what you want ! "

The Nun of Hell did not appreciate at all your jaunt to the land of light. Here you are, back like a prodigal son with your face down and your evasive eyes.
She is a bit harsh with you ; your awareness still has brought you back on the twisted path, the one of self-knowledge.

So you have no certainties. No truth is worthy to your eyes. Everything is dust and truths are just human creations meant to organise this chaos of particles.

You have made your first step into the intellectual deconstruction of the world. That is good.

However, you still have to prove your capacity to strip yourself from this protective gear called personality, which is actually just what we put between knowledge of life and ourselves.

You still hesitate too much between cold awareness and cosy intellectual conformity.

" Get undressed ! " the Nun orders.

And here you are totally naked.
Your exposed and weak skin is the last wall between you and the world. You feel humiliated, vulnerable. A myriad of eyes is looking at you. Some are threatening, others lustful. Some snigger, others drool...

The walls of the vaulted cell where you are now are burning like hot lava.

The floorboards on which your feet are standing are bristled with splinters waiting for the wrong move to get stuck in your soles. The floor is strewn with sharp blades and rusty chains, so much so that the only way to move forward is to walk on tiptoe, in unstable balance.

Your arms, essential poles on this taut rope, are no longer here to protect your modesty now exposed to all threats, all desires.

" Can you feel now the misery of your condition ? Can you see how estranged you are to this world and how artificial was your fusion with it ?

" The illusion of viscous and inert continuity between you and the world is carefully maintained by modern mythologies : health, youth, ambition and success, conspicuous consumption and social recognition, values and aims assigned as entertainment.

" You already suspected the vacuity in all this. It's all too clear now ; everything that prevented you from feeling the roughness and the icy bitterness of things has disappeared.

" You are all alone in the world. You inherit from nothing and nobody. Overall your life is sad rather than happy. Yet you carry on living, on feeling pain until the end ; and here lies all your merit. "